Gretel & Hansel
Anyone familiar with the original versions of classic fairy tales like “Hansel and Gretel” already knows that they have lots of horror movie potential. As a rule though, most attempts to capture these tales on film tend to miss the mark. It’s clear from the conspicuous reversal of the titular names that Gretel & Hansel hopes to distinguish itself from the rest of the pack right from the get-go, but does it actually do the job, or are you better off spending 90 minutes of your time on some other film?
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Jack Crow is much more than a vampire hunter. He is a war machine that considers vampires as the embodiment of Evil and teammates as soldiers to be strictly trained so that they never fail. The Vatican monitors him from afar, assists him through specially trained priests, and supports him economically. This unlikely but functional partnership between this sort of crepuscular cow boy and one of the most important religious institutions in the world undergoes a stop when the ancient and powerful Valek breaks into the room where a vampire hunting party is celebrating, making a killing.
Jack Crow's collaborators all die... Read More
The Blair Witch Project
The Horror! The Horror! It's everywhere this summer. Look at the fear on the face of gorgeous Catherine Zeta-Jones in The Haunting, a $75 million scarefest from Twister director Jan De Bont in which Zeta-Jones' lesbian designs on Lili Taylor pale next to the hideous designs that a haunted New England mansion has on both of them. Or check out The Deep Blue Sea, with Cliff-hanger director Renny Harlin pulling every trick an $80 million budget can buy to put Samuel L. Jackson, Thomas Jane and Saffron Burrows at the mercy of merciless, supersize sharks. Screenwriter David E. Kelley (Ally McBeal, The Practice) seasons the gore with... Read More